The List #24

Gotham City Sirens #9
Writer: Paul Dini
Artist: Guillem March
A lot of this issue focuses on the Riddler, it's his thought bubbles that are central this issue. And I have to say I find this irritating. The series is called Gotham City Sirens, not Gotham City Reformed Villains. If Dini is dying to write a series on The Riddler then go do it, but stop subjecting this series to constant detours to The Riddler when it's supposed to be about the women. It's especially insulting because it seems The Riddler appears every time something needs to be taken seriously, as if the girls are incapable of carrying a serious plot on their own. I'd say it goes so far as to suggest that female villains aren't to be taken as serious.

Another thing that gets me is since when is Ivy a reformed villain? I know Catwoman and Harley are, but Ivy just seems to have slipped into it without any real explanation. More importantly, who are the villains these days? With Ivy, Harley, Catwoman, and The Riddler all reformed it feels like all the best ones besides the Joker are gone.

This issue focuses around a body being dropped into the girls' home and Eddie trying to figure out what they were all doing before then. Harley's day is riddled with 'cutesy' crap and just details of her eccentric nature. Yet again, a mistake is made in writing Harley. The appeal of Harley is that her personality is such a contrast from her line of work. Her cuteness is odd in such a dark setting, and that's her appeal. Instead, Dini has focused in on her too much during this series and humanized her way too much. It's hard to believe she's ever been sick and twisted.

As for Ivy, it appears she was out at a job interview. Which I adore because I've already said I adore the fact that she's written to not need a man and has strong devotion to her cause. Making her a career woman just makes things even better.

As for Catwoman, apparently she was out sparring with Catman. And as a sidenote, I know I've stated before that Catwoman is the Gotham Girl I care about the least, but I've been looking into her recent appearances this past week and I have to say I find myself liking her now. I think it's up to Dini to spotlight her right now considering she's the least worked on Gotham Girl.

Anyway, the girls wrap up their stories and The Riddler goes to their home to check out the body. He makes a note of how the villain neglected to us the specific weapons and materials the girls would have which sort of brings the idea of villainy being an art (especially in such a villain focused universe as the Batman universe).

In the end it turns out the villain trying to frame the girls was none other than... Dr. Aesop!! Yeah, I have no idea who he is, but that's what I get for only reading Batman issues with Ivy in them. Conclusion: I'd say that this issue is worth the buy so long as you don't mind The Riddler.

X-Factor #202
Writer: Peter David
Artist: Bing Cansino
Here's the basic idea of this issue: Layla's working with Dr. Doom and apparently there's an impostor Doom or something from an alt. universe. I think. Whatever, anyway it turns out Invisible Woman is being kept in Castle Doom and it hooked up to a machine where she's exploring trashed fantasies with Namor. And we also finally get to know what Imperius Rex means, an explanation I certainly wouldn't deny.

In the end Monet interrupts and gets Sue out of the machine, everyone on the offensive team runs to go confront Doom. And they come upon a most unexpected scene as they come upon Doom...painting Layla's portrait. Which I kind of love because I have to say Doom humor, or as it should be called 'Dumor,' is a guilty pleasure of mine.

What a diva.

During the closing of the issue, Doom claims to just have been trying to protect Sue and reiterates that he's no longer after the FF4. As everyone is departing it seems an artist mistake was made. It seems Layla was colored to look like Monet (possibly drawn as well?), and the mistake was only fixed by having the 'M' tattoo put on the mis-drawn Layla.

Anyway, the team leaves except Layla makes Shatterstar behind with her and Doom for reasons currently unknown. Oh and back at home the evil Reed Richards is defeated. Conclusion: This issue crossed over the limbo between ok and good that David regularly visits and went into the more positive limbo of between good and great. I would say consider buying it.

X-Men Legacy #233
Writer: Mike Carey
Artist: Clay Mann
This issue is basically made up of two parts. The first is Rogue discovering that Betsy's psi-knife can de-possess and subsequently psi-knifing everyone. You can imagine how tense that was. And the second was Proteus and Magneto's fight which was filled with, "Bah, old man, you're weak, you'll die!.......BAH! Old man, you're weak..." and Magneto in the end 'surprisingly' winning.
A couple things of interests included recreating a scene from the old days of Kurt teleporting around Rogue (this time possessed and trying to possess her, not tickle her) and Rogue eventually predicting his next move. Also, since when can Paige use her bodies of different substances to make powers? Like in this issue she became a fire form while possessed and managed to shoot flames at Rogue. Proteus' reality-bending or is Paige getting an upgrade?

Anyway, possessed Husk is most resistant to Rogue and almost ends up defeating Rogue when Betsy steps in with her psi-knife. And Magneto screws around with Proteus' electromagnetic thingy to make it go away. Afterwards, Rogue and Destiny have a really cute mother/daughter scene. I've always found the Mystique/Rogue mother/daughter relationship sort of unconvincing, but when Destiny's added to the mix I have to say the dynamics make a lot more sense. And it's a tragedy that Destiny couldn't be developed more because I do enjoy her character.

Destiny eventually goes to see Blindfold and we find out that two pre-cogs cancel each other out. And I just realized almost all of the X-Men characters who've been precog at one point or another have also been blind at one point or another. (Destiny, Blindfold, Psylocke, and Gambit. Preview is the only seeing one I can think of.) Destiny tells Ruth she's not her ma and tells her what she knows. Apparently there's an evil brother in the mix, which I can imagine is going to be the subject of a future arc.

And that's it for X-Men Legacy's part in the Necrosha crossover. Probably the one with the least amount of impact yet the best one out of the three. I would definitely recommend buying this arc if you're interested a simple but good superhero arc.

X-Force #24
Writers: Craig Kyle and Chris Yost
Artist: Clayton Crain
In terms of last issue's body count, apparently it's Onyxx, Diamond Lil, and Meld, who I thought was Leech.

This issue starts with Warpath being taken to see Selene, Wither and Eli Bard get into a fight where Wither reveals he's also part-vampire or whatever Eli is. Then Selene kills Eli for his bullshit, and hopefully she'll get killed for her soon since she's just a boring villain in goth lingerie who's into S+M. Not exactly the height of originality.

Warpath is taken into the dungeons so that he can be forced to fight his resurrected brother. He resists, and Johnny can't stop himself but apparently tells James how to kill Selene.

X-Force arrives on Genosha and right as they arrive a few discoveries are made. The first being that Elixir changed Rahne's powerset a bit when he was healing her because of her pregnancy. That and apparently Vanisher's tumor is no more, but he's definitely got some sort of STD that causes spitting up blood. Vanisher ends up deciding to stay with the team though and goes to save James. And Blink, being the bitch she is, blows up Telford's arm as he's in the process of saving because no good deed goes unpunished.

X-Force's presence is discovered and there begins epic fight scene which is mixed in with Selene's ritual prep. The ritual eventually happens, can't tell if all the resurrected people die in the process, but I suppose it's to be assumed. And so now Selene's a god. The God of Boring Cliche's I'd wager.

Conclusion: This issue is only somewhat more interesting and intense than past issues, but it still ends up being pretty mediocre and not all that intense.

The List #7

X-Men Legacy #227
Writer: Mike Carey
Artist: Dustin Weaver

X-Men Legacy this month was sort of meh. It's Carey, I expect f#@%ing magic with him, so it's especially disappointing when he puts out a half-baked story like this one. There is something Carey has done perfect though. You probably saw it coming but:

Ariel is the gayest thing to happen to the X-Men, even Daz and Northstar together can't match her. Seriously, Carey, I plan this to be the last issue of Legacy I include on my blog unless you get another Emma-centric issue in, BUT if you continue to include Ariel I promise I will fucking sing your praise like no other.

More on Ariel, I had a dream last night that I Wikipedia-ed her and the entry said she was transgendered. Weird, yes, but it's a goddamned delicious idea. Seriously, Ariel as a male-to-female transgendered person would just be HEAVEN. If I ever get a Marvel comic team book, Ariel is so going to be revealed to be trans and she will be a fan favorite.

Going back to the issue. Danger was plain and unimportant. The story concerning Hope Abbott was so cheesy it could've been one of those blurbs at the end of Sailor Moon where one of the Sailor scouts is like, "If you and a friend don't get along, try to calmly work things out, it's not worth losing a friend over! See you soon!"

What deserves noting is that Moonstone is more like herself under Carey than she is in Reed's f#@%ing Ms. Marvel. Just zapped a bitch in the face without a thought!

Summary, this 2-issue Utopia tie-in was sort of lame. Except for Ariel, she's divine. I know I sound hard on Carey, but the thing is I've seen him do better. A LOT BETTER. And this is shit next to his other work. So Mike Carey, please get back to being Mike Carey for us, your fans.

X-Factor #47
Writer: Peter David
Artist: Valentine De Landro

To start, Peter David, thank you for not making Fitzroy a resurrection, but him before he traveled back in time and all that. Resurrections are ridiculous lately and we SO don't need another. Something that needs addressing about this issue though is the villains dominate too much spotlight time. I'm honestly so bored I just skim the villain's part. It's confusing. By the time I do get what's going on, I realize I don't care. And don't forget for a second: the cast is fucking huge. Do we really need to have more and more people getting involved? Which also can be aimed at the addition of Fitzroy. To an already overpacked cast. Despite his talent, David just is not managing this plus sized cast well anymore.

As for the Ricstar update, it was brief and unfulfilling like a quick handjob in the back of someone's car. Seriously, Rictor had more serious conversations with one-nighter Rahne. Let's talk it up, boys!

Dr. Doom this issue was love. My love for him is like my love for Joan Crawford. I don't love them when they're in their prime and in full power. I love them when they're losing their power because their aging and it also causes their mind to go fruit loops. Seriously, Doom's farewell parade in his mind was David gold.

Of other note, the cast seems to have gotten so big that all the other characters that don't get love in the issue are becoming cameo queens. Darwin this issue? Pure cameo queen. Longshot might've taught him the basics considering he was married to our Mistress of Momentary Manifestations (and I thought calling her Diva was fun). Even worse was Siryn because this was her all issue.

Also, it seems David is picking up another dangling thread by mentioning that Shatterstar and Longshot have similar DNA or something to the point of....we never found out. Check out next issue though, we're probably going to hear that Shatterstar is the gay son of Dazzler and Longshot. Which I would lose my f#@%ing mind over in celebration. Dazzler? Mom of a gay? I'm for that!

OH and Monet recovers from the mind control and fights the villain naked. Mmm, yummy. I'd be all over that if I were straight. The issue ended with a mandatory 'revelation' that this series is pulling too often with less and less shock factor. Seriously David dear, end off an issue with a simple 'Oh shit' sometimes, it doesn't always have to get sub-soap opera-y.

Mighty Avengers
Writer: Dan Slott
Artist: Khoi Pham

To begin, I picked this out to keep tabs on Young Avengers activity. And now I regret it. But I am glad that Cassie and Vision might no longer on the team because honestly that would be like the trimming off the fat of the team. I swear I feel so annoyed with Cassie it's like she's practically become a devout Christian that goes around with their nose in the air.

The issue was dry. The art was unappealing. The characters in the fight scene were men doing the same old philosophy of nations dance that is nothing new. at least we had this woman:

In closing, don't expect to see MA on this blog again, so not worth my time to even read, let alone review. BUT I do have to say, this panel of Scarlet Witch is one the most beautiful I've ever seen.

Dark Reign: The Cabal

As is the case with most of my posts on the Cabal, I'm pretty much going to comment mainly on Emma with only a couple things to say on the other stories.

I just looked up what was going on in the Dr. Doom story and I am not pleased. Emma being tied up to Dr. Doom's fucking chair as a sex slave is ridiculous. Please fucking die Doom, your arrogance pissed me off so much throughout this one-shot. Loki being tied up, whatever, she can turn into a man and make his masculinity feel challenged. The story in it self was good besides the Emma sex slave part, but what I want to talk about is the artist: ADI GRANOV! (click here to see). AND he made a fucking amazing costume for her which should be used instead of that shitty edit made to her AWESOME costume.

Continuing on The Hood story had egh art with an egh story up until the end. That part was good. Namor's story was good except the art used was ridiculously unattractive. Namor's a guy who lounges in his speedos ALL day. Give him an artist that will give him a sexy edge. Also, I noticed that Namor and Northstar are very similar creatures in the arrogance sense. Of course, A LOT of Marvel men are full of....themselves. Still, resemblance? I think so at least. Loki story was boring. I've never been a Peter Milligan fan and this just reinforces that. And I'm sick of Doom and his arrogance, I wish for his death at the end of this.

Now to the main event: Emma's story.

The artist was fine in this case even though last time since she was in the Hellfire club in the artist's (Daniel Acuna) pages she just looked like a cheap French whore so it looked terrible. Felt like too much perfume in a small room. Still, not Adi Granov. I liked that even paid attention to minor details like what Emma was wearing when the sentinels attacked since it barely differed from the usual and he even put in layered hair like it was.

Fraction finally wrote Emma like I want! Concerning the morning of the 16 million mutant massacre, Emma discusses how it was just any other Tuesday and says, "I said something dumb and bitchy masquerading as clever and naughty and mean. My first refuge when I've got nothing else to say." YES! Now you're getting it! There are just so many things that are finally correct with Fraction's Emma.

Wonderful!

Revisiting her family sort of undid the damage done by that talentless crap Emma Frost series. We finally see Emma as she was in New X-Men #139: Flat-chested and scrawny. Everything is back as they should be although Christian looks old again which I wish he'd A. Be brought back B. Not as an old man since he can't be more than a few years older than Adrian.

I also love that Emma's motive for teaching was explained. The fact that she teaches to help kids that were in her place is a wonderful reason.

Finally, Emma Frost has been written right by Matt Fraction! I've bitched long and hard and it's like fate's responded. Or Fraction caught my bitching on CBR? One problem: It was all review and not a new story though it did show new insight into her character and was definitely her voice. After my first day of good quality Fraction I am excited to see where Uncanny X-Men #509 goes since I still don't have it.

Secret Invasion: Dark Reign

Writer: Brian Michael Bendis
Artist: Alex Maleev
To start, I read a lot of comic books, but do not have people to converse with about them since other comic book readers do not usually read the ones I do (mainly X-Men). So I have a lot to say with no one to say it too. Part of this blog that will be devoted to comic book criticism which will likely relate a lot to Emma Frost.

Anyway, this week's comic book is the one-shot Secret Invasion: Dark Reign. The only reason why I picked it up will be about the only part I'm critiquing very closely is: Emma Frost.

This issue begins with Emma in dreamland-ish landscape which is basically Emma in the Sentry's mind again meaning just white around her. But poorer art. Good to show that Emma has continued guilt over Kitty's death since certain writers seem to forget just because the guilt is addressed once does not mean it just went away.

She then wakes up and gets a telegram inviting her to Avengers Tower. She has a snipe-y moment, first time in awhile where it feels real since Fraction writes her to basically be a spoiled brat on Uncanny. She flies over to Avengers Tower and meets Doom in a basement meeting room where he acts like he's amazing. His narcissism is tired and this is only the 5th issue I've ever read with him in it. One problem with it is Emma's response to Doom after he says he's too almighty to be mind read is "Yeah. Okay." Emma Frost's way of speaking is very controlled, she glorifies being remarkable, so instead she would say something like "Whatever you say, darling."
A simple 'Yeah. Okay.' just sounds idiotic.

Then she meets Namor. Who's being drawn to look a dirty middle-aged man and apparently has a hearing problem. The Hood appears after, Emma displays that she does not care that people around her want privacy in their own heads and I absolutely love it. Then the dumbass points the gun on her, he seems really boringly over the edge, so she lets him know who's boss, favorite moment in the issue.

Loki appears followed by Norman Osbourne. He explains what's happened since Secret Invasion which is good since I do not give a damn, Secret Invasion was drawn out for way too long and seemed REALLY fucking boring. I promise I will not say boring half as many times next review. Either way, he talks a lot about nothing I cared about. Emma explains she's different, she doesn't have a kingdom she lost, then the endangered issue of mutants is brought up and Osbourne calls her the White Queen. Except that hasn't been for a LONG time now. Osbourne explains her being there keeps the mutants from being in concentration camps and she needs to make 'bold moves' which is vague and not really a reason, she can make bold moves elsewhere.

Then Osbourne continues speechifying. He walks around behind each of them, Emma's specific panel make her seems like she's getting some under the table and is just a really unlikely pose she'd make no matter how sexual she may be. Then everyone leaves. The rest I did not read since I can barely keep interest in the issue without Emma in it, egotistical men=snooze fest. Emma has the dream again and wakes up screaming, Scott does not even wake up. Fin.

Art-wise: Alex Maleev was really unremarkable, a step above the horrible artist that did Wolverine Origins when Emma appeared. In terms of colors, there were mainly light colors which does not go with the villain theme; dark colors or a lot of contrast would have worked better. The pencils seem scratchy and Emma just looks like any other blonde chick. She isn't, she should look very fierce. At least she did not have that horrible white tranny makeup that too many artists think works for her. But the light makeup with pink lips isn't her either, she'd likely had a dark upper lid and eyeliner defined lower one along with a red-pink lipstick.

Overall: Good for the parts with Emma, but the art just made the issue drag on in a really mundane way. I could have lived without owning the issue.