Wednesday, April 7, 2010

Uncanny X-Men #523 Review

Writer: Matt Fraction
Artist: Terry Dodson
This issue was exactly what I thought it would be. An issue devoted to featuring the uninteresting hegemonic male character who all seem to be the same guy, just with different appearances and on different sides. Plus boring pencils from Dodson and Fraction doing the bare minimum to progress anything.

This issue starts with Cable and Hope on the run, robbing a store to get supplies. While this is going on, something catches Hope's eye, and it turns out to be a hairbrush set for little girls. Later on it turns out Cable got it for her, and she's touched by the gesture. I found this to be one of the effective moments in this issue because it reminds us that despite Hope being forced to act like an adult from such a young age, it's not like she's actually matured underneath it all.

Then again, I found this touching because I've dealt with her and her lost childhood for two minutes. But for other Marvel reader we've had the Cable SERIES, Messiah War, A Girl Called Hope or whatever backstory, AND a one-shot. And I'd be willing to bet this character doesn't even have a real personality yet?

Back with Alpha Team, Kurt's freaking out because he needs to have a character moment in the spotlight like he hasn't had in ages. Because it wouldn't be a proper sendoff if he didn't get some extra spotlight. Kurt even considers quitting, asks Scott is X-Force is sanctioned by him, and Scott owns up. So now that two year long bellyaching over "What if the other X-Men find out?" finally is over and done with, not like I didn't see this reaction coming the MINUTE X-Force was back.

Remember what I said about him becoming like Ink?
And how his power would be used in ridiculous ways with flimsy explanations just to say he's cool now and has some real power? Legit, just because he can read languages shouldn't make him able to split his attention between a million streams of data at once.

Back in some villain place, Bastion addresses Stryker, Hodge, and some other boring villains. OF course it was some cliched speech that I didn't even pay any attention to, but whatever, here's my take on what was said: "Bahaha, hello fellow uninteresting hegemonic male villains! Our goal here is to repel readers from the X-Books with our insane levels of mediocrity and with no one ever believing us to be any real threat to the X-Men! For we are white, heterosexual male characters, the easiest to be written as completely fucking bland! Go now, BORE THE MASSES!!"

So Stryker attacks Cable and Hope's motel, they fight, yet again it's Cable's series, and X-Force arrives and that's the end. Yes, so in the end this issue was exactly as predictably mind-numbingly mundane as I thought. And Dodson was not helping. Conclusion, do not buy this issue unless you absolutely have to have all the issues of Second Coming.

And on a side note, something I forgot about one of my candidates in my poll:

This released today and it pretty much guarantees Beast living past Second Coming [CBR].
Oh and if anyone was wondering about the general opinion of the Internet on who's going to die, all signs I've seen point to Kurt. Something new I've heard recently (and you'll see it if you click the link) is that apparently there will be seven deaths? I'm not sure whether to believe that or not, but sounds better than just the one. And that's all for my blog this week, see you all next week with Chapter 3 of Second Coming.


FSaker said...

Did you really think Beast had any chance of dying, though? He's not even a member of the X-Men nowadays... and it would be very stupid to bring him back just to have him killed one or two issues later.

Anyway, what's your opinion on the Second Coming event so far? Did Fraction's issue ruin it or can it be the great event that Messiah CompleX was and that both Utopia and Necrosha failed to be?

Mr. Hellfire said...

Not really, it was just sort of a wild guess to add on, and were he still with the X-Men it would've fit really well considering his opposition to X-Force. But I just sort of threw him on there as a What If?

Second Coming is exactly what I thought it would be: A bunch of hegemonic male villains boring the masses and the X-Men being focused on the male characters who are particularly dull or over-used these days. I would hope that it could work itself back to being like Messiah Complex because the was one of the best crossover I've EVER read.